Googling the Future - D'OH

I have realized the true importance of thinking before I speak. I am so grateful the cat is away or he would've heard my premature wrath of fulishness and a whiny, needy brat I would've made myself out to be and for good reason.

Today I have asked the question on Y!A (the answers I received being less than reassuring which brought me to tears), reflected on my needs and what I really want out of this relationship and did some soul and Google searching as well. Yes, I Googled 'workaholic boyfriend' and what I found made me pull a Homer Simpson and I smacked myself in the head for being so pathetically juvenile. Whoever would've thought Google could save a relationship?

What I previously thought wasn't enough is more than sufficient. Hey, I am a woman. I have the prerogative to change my mind more than once and back again. When I look at all those things now I see his effort. I'm not involved with no doctor who is on call 24/7 and works crazy hours. The cat is here for almost every meal and almost always helps me with the dishes. He's home every night at a fairly reasonable time. He includes me when possible. If I can go too he asks whether it's a afternoon trip to pick up lumber or around the corner to the hardware store. I know that when I really need him he will be there - no matter what he's just a phone call away. What he does really is for us. He may not be home to do the kind of things I would like to do but he still comes home. That's my compromise. Giving up the small things for the big things in the future.

Cyber Stalked

Some time in March I became a part of the Facebook population after receiving a few friendly invites in my inbox. It was the perfect opportunity to stay connected with friends, family and co-workers back home who have computers. Rather than sending random pictures of my adventures through e-mail, on Facebook, I can upload as many as I wish and add captions 'cause who doesn't get frustrated flipping through some one's vacation mementos and not know a damn thing that's going on and find yourself having to constantly ask the who's, what's, where's and how's?

For anyone, if any such person exists, who is unfamiliar with Facebook it is one of the largest social networking sites on the net, closely along side with Myspace. What started out as being a network strictly for college and university students soon opened up to anyone with a Internet connection. If you listen to 102.1 The Edge in Toronto who hosted a Facebook related contest, CBC News who created The Great Canadian Wish List or if you watch the news at all most likely you've heard of Facebook.

From various employees losing their positions at their employments for pictures, posts or spending too much time on the site while at work to groups being created to bring awareness to political injustices, Facebook is making waves and rightly so.

I have found classmates, childhood friends, estranged family members all with a click (some of them found me) and while my friends list continues to grow shortly after the few initial wall posts with the typical Heys, how've you beens it abruptly stops. The connection becomes idle and I'm left with only a few who on a regular basis keep in touch.

The lioness above was taken from a friend who, on my own terms, I lost contact. She found me on Facebook and we've been politely exchanging messages, catching up on things I honestly do not care about. The friendship ended for many reasons, one being stalker-ish issues which I'm again noticing through the site.

If I happen to update my profile or add pictures to one of my albums and do not reply to one of her messages she is there asking if I've fallen off the keyboard. I am beginning to wonder if her children are being compromised for her time online. I am thankful that through cable wires and computer screens is and will be as far as it goes. I am sure that if I was back home she'd be asking to do coffee and rekindle a flame that has been permanently blown out.

Some final thoughts: Do be cautious of what you share with the online world, your real world could be jeopardized. As for stalking, I currently feel no threat but we all know that threat does exist from other lurkers. If you use Facebook do not add anyone you do not personally know to your friends list. My privacy settings are set high and there is no personal information included in my profile. This should all go without saying but time and time again someone out there proves that some sort of reinforcement will always need to be made.

Good luck and happy surfing!

Net Speak: Hip Amongst the Lazy and/or Stupid

Typing like a complete idiot actually takes effort for me. Maybe I'm just not in the loop or too old for the "cool" kids (never thought I would ever see myself saying that) but I truly do not understand the willingness of today's youngsters (and the not so young but wannabes) to torture and violate the written word.

Case in point: WeLcOmE To Ta DaRk SiDe oF mE. That took much longer than needed to type out. Now, I realize I'm only drawing attention to the said blog but it's absolutely, positively pathetic and honestly, it's one of the milder blogs of its kind. (It only takes 30 minutes to read a single entry whereas some take an hour or more to translate with dictionary in hand).

I do understand the need for short forms in chat or messenger simply to keep up with busy conversation but in forums or places such as Blogger there is no excuse. Personally, when I see a blog written with numbers for letters, alternating capitals, cud rather than could, etc I cringe and immediately stereotype them as lazy.

If a blogger can not take the time to properly type out a post then why should I as a reader take the time to decipher it?

$$$ - The Root of All Evil

It's been awhile since I've felt the tight grip of stress in my chest and stomach. Its fingers curled and ripping. Not a happy feeling but one I am accustomed to, or at least I was back home, especially when it came to financial situations.

I won't bore you with the details of how we came to be in this predicament as it is useless drivel - 6 months that we can not undo or change. I will tell you this; buying a home, accessories (fireplace, sofa, dining set, curtains, gallons upon gallons of paint) and trying to live while on a LOA from our jobs back home on the small amount we received from the sale of our house did not help our cause. Mom's already gone back 2 months earlier than we were expecting.

While I am still employed back home I desperately need to start working ASAP but will not find out for another couple weeks if I got the job I applied for. I have no intentions of returning to Ontario but I'm just not ready to give up that security and alas, become officially unemployed. Mom doesn't go back to work until June 5th and won't see a pay for 2 weeks after that. Bills do not stop, food does not keep and my bank account is not getting any bigger, my friends.

I am trying other avenues but the lack in traffic to this blog is really going to tarnish my chances at a PayPerPost career. Hopefully AGLOCO will pull through.